Vision of Unrest
Pain, the festering fisticuffs a slugfest of survival, rendering, retching, wrestling and running. Forward fumbling, rumbling and tumbling, risking and revolting rushing from my deprivation, indubitably dragging it along.
I sure do appreciate your email and your interest in our veterans, they need our love and support. The soldiers that are in denial will have to figure out for themselves that they need help. The sad thing is that it will probably take years for their mental illness to progress to the point of prison, unemployability, divorce, addiction, homicide, and finally suicide. Giving them information and support will help, but they will not get help until they are ready to.(e-mail edited for clarity and fluidity)
The whole soldiering thing trains us to believe we are self sufficient in matters other than survival and combat. You know the ad on TV that says an Army of one. As much as they drill team work on a firing squad, movement, and never leave a buddy; they instill this facade of invincibility. Most of our soldiers are at the age of ego development, where a good dose of identifying emotions and empathy would negate the aggressive side that young men feel. It is an evolutionary instinctual part of a boy growing into a man. In primitive cultures their are rituals that incorporate the aggression and identify it for what it is and integrate this "warrior" archetype into the complete person. Usually along the way an elder mentors them and helps them identify the emotions and differing parts of the psyche while instilling an integration of the differing selfs, mother earth, community and spirituality.
In the military this ritual just concentrates on the drilling and killing so that it becomes automatic, a reflexive response to aggression and survival. My point is that the focus is on how to kill and do that, not how do I deal with it after they go home to their community and family. They are left without a ritual of connection to community, family, and wholeness. Their formative connection is back in the field of combat and killing, they leave part of themselves there with their buddies who are not coming home yet and take with them the guilt of leaving their buddies behind. They feel that egoistic "warrior archetype" connection with the military and the battle buddy who has his or her back in the combat zone. In this type of mind frame when the veteran goes home; they become lost in a world that no longer makes sense to them because they have been taught to not process the five senses and emotional attachment to interaction. The hard wiring of the combat veterans mind acts as if their life depends on it. How do I live in regular society if I am stuck in this malposition?
Well did I just rattle of some stuff or what. No I do not even know what EFT is, but I will certinally research the approach and look into its value and techniques. As far as volunteering you do not need a degree. Just research different groups and decide which one appeals to you and offer your help. If they do not have the area of service you would like to help with, then organize it yourself. I am looking into groups who mentor young veterans coming out of the military to help with the process of reintegrating back into society and help them access and identify their new roles and other aspects of their intrinsic values and principles.
I am 40 and in school, I have seen many people in my classes who are in their 50's and older. Go to school and chase your passions, by doing so work becomes something other than a task. It becomes a part of you that connects with people in a way we were meant to be, a community of people supporting one another.
I would like to talk more with you and keep in contact by email for now. Thank you for your response to my blog I am deeply appreciative of it. You are the first to email me about it, again thank you. If you would, write some comments on articles that interest or touch you the most. Also, if you would subscribe, digg it, stumble it, email it to all your friends and tell of my mission and the epidemic of mentally ill veterans we will be faced with in the coming years.
You brightened my day,
Hello my son,
Have I told you that I love you enough? Well, I don't think so, so I'm going to say it. I LOVE YOU MY SON.
I think about you all the time son, I want the best for you and am willing to help you achieve the goals that you have set for yourself. I see that you have some long term goals and some short term goals. That’s great to have a vision of where you want to be in the future.
Right now it’s the little things that will get you there that need to be worked on. Setting little steps to achieve the short term goals is the key to accomplishing the long term goals. There is a process to progressing toward realizing a fulfilling and meaningful life. Like setting goals of submitting at least 10 applications a week, become willing and open to talking with your significant other about your feelings and thoughts at least once a week when the time feels right. Or, research information about apprenticeships and other jobs that may interest you. Get all of the information so you can make a sound decision on the direction you want to go.
Figure out how much it will cost to maintain your own apartment, rent, gas and car expenses, insurance, electricity, cable, phone, groceries and entertainment. Another thing to consider is where exactly you want to live, what part of town. Then there is the cost of acquiring furniture and kitchen items.
Make an effort to talk with me about things that may have bothered or upset you when you were younger. Son, it is important that you face these issues and work them out with me. By interacting with me in this way you can acquire the skills of assertiveness, coping, anger management, stress reduction, interpersonal (person to person) communication, and confidence in knowing how to handle stressful situations.
All of this stuff is taxing and stressful, with the right planning and accomplishing the little steps you will grow into a more responsible and respectful young man; a man of honor, character and integrity. Set these values and principles for yourself and use them as a compass to your life, you are the captain of your ship. By filtering your decisions, thoughts and feelings through a set of ethics we gain that integrity we have talked about. By doing these things you will gain confidence and a sense of self about who you are.
Find some activities that you would be interested in getting involved in, like a softball league, hell I would do that too. That way we could socialize with more men; do the manly thing you know, testosterone. We can sit down and go over a plan for accomplishing these things, it will help relieve some of the stress and give you a focus and direction.
Well, I have preached enough,
Originally published as "Hello my son."
A couple of days ago I went out on a foot patrol in Sadr City with a young a soldier and noticed the tattoo on his arm, featuring a rosary and the words “Forgive Me.” I asked him what the story behind it was.
He said, “After my first tour in Iraq, I went back home to the states and all my friends called me a murderer and killer. I guess I started thinking a lot about all the things I had done over here…you know.”
This posting has been edited somewhat, but I wanted to leave as much of the disjointed and convoluted train of thought to give you an indication of my thinking processes